Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Mother's Day-2010

Mother's Day 2010-The first Mother's Day I did nothing for my Mom. I called, but that was it. A call and nothing more. I got her a card a week before Mother's Day and as always, I had the hardest time finding a card. It's hard to find words to describe how i feel about the Mom she is and especially the Mom she is today. The card is still sitting at home. Mother's day has come and gone and that card still remains in the same spot i placed it in after i bought it. I called her on Mother's Day as Josh and I were heading to the swap meet to pick up a gift for her. I planned on getting her a gift and possibly taking her to breakfast/lunch until she told me she had to work pretty much the whole day. Just like every year on Mother's Day, she had to work. So i told her i would call her after we were done at the swap meet and that we would probably stop by to at least drop off her card and gift. But i lied. We got her a gift, i picked out a nice purse for her that i knew she would love and then driving home i convinced myself that I was not going to go out of my way for her this year as i always do! Why should I after all she's done? Why should I when she volunteers to work on Mother's Day every year! Josh and I went home and i never called her. I've spoken to my Mom once since that day. I'm still a little angry i guess you can say......I promised myself i would forgive her for all she's done because the bible says we need to forgive in order to let go of the pain one had caused us but it's hard to forgive when the other person keeps letting you down. I don't know who or what to blame for who my Mom is today and as much as i would like to blame the drugs, i don't. She has a mind of her own and could have very well walked away a long time ago when she saw how much damage doing drugs did to not only her but her family as well.

Mother's Day 2010-I'm pretty sure it hurts me more to know for once i did nothing for her then it hurts her that she didn't have her kids there to celebrate being a Mother. She only cares about herself, one day I will completely understand that and stop worrying and caring as much as i do.

Friday, June 11, 2010


What better companionship is there than that of a loving husband and wife working together to achieve common objectives? And who better to team up with than the one you love, the person with whom you've chosen to share your deepest hopes, your fondest dreams, your very life?

Josh and I are constantly working towards our goals, dreams and our life together. In a short amount of time we have already accomplished more than we ever thought was possible. The moment Josh and I knew we were meant to be together forever, all of our goals/dreams became each others. God designed marriage to make those two people stronger together than they ever were when they were single. As a result, you don't need to be afraid to set big goals...set goals as a couple and do not give up on any of those goals! Our goals in life are what make life worth the journey of always trying to succeed and have fun while doing so.

One of the biggest problems marriages face today is that spouses cling to their own individuality rather than fully entering into their new identity as a couple. They hold onto independence at the expense of the unity God intended, maintaining separate bank accounts, separate pursuits, separate vacations, separate friends. Oftentimes they unknowingly have different visions for their marriage and their future. It's common for people to take marriage lightly these days, as if it's just another piece of paper signed. Marriage is not about that piece of paper you signed (you sign it and never see it again) it's about uniting as one, forever. I met a girl not too long ago in which i became friends with. Same age as me, nice girl, fun, but so clueless on what love and what a relationship is all about. I don't know why but people like this just really irritate me. I feel like they have so much to learn still and that i cannot even connect with them on a "friend" level because my love and companionship with Josh is so different then the way they view love, relationships, and marriages. This girl made a comment one day about someone she was once really good friends with and how their friendship kind of vanished once her friend got married. She said "she just changed after marriage, every time I wanted to hang out she wanted to invite her husband too, we stopped talking as much as we use to etc....I don't think a person should change just because they get married". After hearing her say this I immediately knew she was someone I probably was not going to be able to connect with on a friend level. Which brings me to say this:

Part of having a happy marriage is developing similar interest and becoming the best of friends. Friendship is such an important part of romance. Having fun and enjoying life together is one of the best things about being married; it forms a wonderful relationship that can cement a marriage through years. Never neglect this important part of marriage. Whether it be traveling, working out , trying new restaurants, sitting on the couch watching a movie, having a drink when you get home from work, trying a new activity that one or both of you have never done before, do it together! Spouses should truly be best friends. Developing common activities and interests really draws you closer together to that person over time rather than slowly drifting apart. Best of all, you create this intimacy that goes far beyond any friendship. In other words, when you get married you do change and you should change. Two become one and together you create a stronger relationship, friendship, bond, loyalty, than you have ever had with ANYONE. You should want to include your husband in EVERYTHING you do and those close friendships you had with others before should not be nearly as close as the friendship you share with your husband. Your husband should become your number one and you should become his. Josh and I share our friends. We don't have separate friends and i have no room in my life for a friends that are separate from the friends Josh and I share together.

Within the past few months I have come across so many new friends. The more and more people I get to know, married or not, the more i realize how selfish and un-driven so many people are in their relationships. The married people i come across take their marriage for granted and still only care about themselves. The ones in a relationship, but not yet married, just have the wrong idea of what love and a relationship should be all about. Love is not about how much money you spend on someone or the places you take someone. Love is about the smallest of things: A special favor, a helping hand with chores, a card, a touch, a hug, a kiss, slow dance (Josh loves this), a listening ear, a REAL conversation, a shared memory, hearty laughter, a wink, a smile, a compliment, friendship, thoughtfulness.

It's always fun to get to know new people but even after all the new people i have come across or have made friends with, i have realized my old true friends will always be the people i remain close with and whom will always understand the love i share with my husband. Old friends grow with you and i am glad to say those who have grown with me have also grown to love my husband just as much as they love me : )


Love- Selfless, patient, humble, forgiving, hopeful, kind, unfailing

Trust- Rock-Solid as long as it is cherished and protected-both are essential to your relationship

Commitment- The resolution to keep your wedding vows at all costs. It's the cornerstone that supports security-and ironically, freedom-and it stands side by side with trust.

Faith-It is the chief cornerstone, the one that unites the entire structure so it stands straight and tall.